before i begin i would like to say that ilonara ingbriham is the bestest/awesomest host ever!! (sheisalsotheyoungestpersonevertoundergoapoptosis =)

well what i wanted to say was that there are so many things that i wish i could do
when i think about it the only thing stopping me from trying is my mentality; as they say, impossible is nothing :)

so yesterday i went to the mcdonalds sydney performing arts challenge thing and played first in my division. made SOO many mistakes in the last piece but managed to cover them up pretty well so was happy. next guy gets up to play and im not joking; in his first few bars of his first piece he managed to already beat me and my three pieces; he was THAT good

i was sitting there watching him (all the time trying to make sure my mouth wasnt hanging open in amazement like an idiot) and for the 20minutes he played, i watched and listened SO hard and i am pretty much 100% sure that he did not stuff up ONCE. everything about him was so perfect; his musicality, his technique was flawless, he was so damn perfect i wanted to cry.

because no matter what; i could never play like that
and i wish i could

somehow i think that i have to work harder than everyone else to achieve the same skill
it'd be nice to be so talented i didnt have to try
but thats not the way things work